Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in playheartache's LiveJournal:

[ << Previous 20 ]

Monday, October 30th, 2006
4:23 pm	I've had this journal for far too long. I felt it was time for a change, well... I was bored. www.livejournal.com/sixleftfeet I only really expect Abby to add it but oh well. Too tired to care. Cheers. Current Music: Julie Doiron »» Exhale
Sunday, September 18th, 2005
4:36 pm	boys will be boys... girls will be girls... either way, we mess things up, we talk shit, we do stuff we're not supposed to. But i'll tell you something now, we're fucking young, make as many mistakes as possible, it will only make you stronger when you really need to be strong. i'm nothing special, i'm just a girl... a girl that will be a girl. not much else. »» 3 Exhale
Monday, September 5th, 2005
4:37 pm	1. Go here. 2. Pass it on. ( my answers ) »» 5 Exhale
Tuesday, August 30th, 2005
4:12 pm	the one kid who can dance like there's no tomorrow. Thank you for dancing with me Dave, even though you had to remind me we did. haha. I love you. »» 1 Exhale
Tuesday, August 23rd, 2005
11:37 pm	Sometimes things change without us even realising and when we finally look back, all we can ask oursleves is... what went wrong? »» 1 Exhale
Saturday, August 20th, 2005
11:23 pm	I just read her journal. How shit do i feel now? Really shit, infact so shit that i'm crying :( how gay is that. I can't deal with this. I really can't i just want to give up but i know i won't. i just won't. »» Exhale
Thursday, August 18th, 2005
12:50 pm	I like this picture a lot.   this is a picture of me two-stepping... It was a fun day :) Current Mood: fine :) Current Music: THE STREETS!!- SAME OLD THING »» 3 Exhale
Saturday, August 13th, 2005
7:57 pm	From now on... »» 2 Exhale
Wednesday, August 10th, 2005
10:09 pm	Always assuming the worst but you're going on none the less and there's nothing to cushion your heart, let it fall. letters from further away keep pulling me close to home there's something to cushion my callas eyes, i know that you hope for the good goodbyes embracing for forever and falling in your eyes, in your eyes, your eyes. pouring over photographs im living in your letters, breathe deeply from this envelope it smells like you and i can't be without that scent it's filling me with all you mean to me. Continually failing these trails but you stand by me none the less and you wont let me sink though im begging you, im begging you. Phone calls from further away and messages on my machine but i dont ever tell you this distance seems terrible theres no need to test my heart with useless space, these wounds go on forever they'll always be a place for you, my heart. so i'll leave the pavement its got to be better than waiting and pushing you far away cause im scared. so i'll take my chances and head on my way up there cause... turning to you is like falling in love when you're dead. Dashboard confessional marathon started 22:11 and on going... Current Mood: peaceful Current Music: DASHBOARD CONFESSIONAL MARATHON »» 1 Exhale
Sunday, August 7th, 2005
2:56 pm	I should stop thinking about him really shouldn't i? Don't get hopes high then there's no room for disappointment. x Current Mood: awake Current Music: The Starting Line- Nothings gonna stop us now »» Exhale
Saturday, August 6th, 2005
10:32 pm	OMMGGG! Today was so good :) someone made me smile someone gave me those butterflies again someone made my saturday afternoon and evening i remember what it feels like now... your smile is amazing even if it does look like winters :D your eyes are even more amazing! like BLUEEE YO! your piercings are like... *sexual noise that you enjoyed today* hah your hair is... :P HIP BONES 'KIN HOT BONES! Your name won't be stated but you know who you are anyway :) *urgeeeee!!! :D* Current Mood: happy and horny Current Music: Jimmy Eat World - My Sundown »» 1 Exhale
Thursday, August 4th, 2005
4:10 pm	So... I've done it... I've taken every effort possible to get rid of you. Get you out of my mind and out of my life, this time... for good. Yup, this time it's going to last. This time i'm holding myself together and finally this time, i'm staying strong. I hope no-one judges me for this but... i've never been so proud of myself :) i don't know how many people can understand why but i know a good few who will read this do understand... dave abby ... you two have looked after me recently. You're both real good friends. I'm glad i can call you one of mine :) so thank you <3! xo Current Mood: accomplished Current Music: None »» 2 Exhale
Tuesday, August 2nd, 2005
5:03 pm	Please read this!!!! Please read this!!!! Please read this!!!! Recently, something has come to my attention... Some people are fucking pricks. Really though. It's actually beyond a joke. "I have all the friends i need, so i'll be nasty, racist, and verbally discuisting to everyone else" FUCK THAT! There are still kids in the world and none of them deserve to be treated like shit from little pathetic people like the ones i am writing about. I hate it. I hate the fact the whole world is hostile. Our eyes-view is that of around 160 degrees... some people are looking through a fucking peep-hole. It's about time people opened there fucking eyes and looked at what the fuck is going on. As if there are not enough problems in the world, all around... all these fucking kids think about is who are they going to fucking pick on next. I hate it. I really do. I am not physically aggressive and if i am it's for a fucking good reason. These people don't have a reason to even be alive. As awful a thing that is to say, i'll stand by it because someone who for a hobbie, bullies people, has no space in my life and shouldn't have any space in yours. I used to be proud to live in Leeds... recently, i've never been so ashamed and all because of the dick head people that live in this town. Current Mood: fucked off! Current Music: Sydney-Halifax »» 2 Exhale
Saturday, July 30th, 2005
10:16 am	I feel like i'm going to be sick. I have such a bad hangover. I might even die. Party life style is so FOR ME but not :S 'cause it makes me want to die haha i wish i was cool enough to handle by alcohol and substances. i've found a new love for poppers DAMN THAT EX BOYFRIEND OF MINE! you're regretfull, we're regretfull, i'm regretfull bollocks, i ballsed up again not that it matters to anyone sorry what was that? Yes i do want to die still hah i love james blunt, he makes me sex weeee weee crazy frog is pissing me off now this is pretty random lets hang out i look after my friends, i give them hugs and they get sympathy money that we can get wasted on! i love my life i actually do im off now might go die byeee xo Current Mood: kin knackered! Current Music: none »» 2 Exhale
Thursday, July 28th, 2005
12:46 pm	Am i not your problem anymore? Would you not worry anymore? I was alone in the centre of leeds at 11 at night, you were so worried, back then you let me know. I hate feeling this alone. Even though i know i'm not Um what you say? Ooh that you only meant well? COURSE YOU DID. Um what you say? Ooh that's it's all for the best? COURSE IT IS! I'm bored of feeling this way when i know you feel nothing like this. Hull VS Leeds. It never had to be like that. Ever. Current Mood: drained Current Music: Dear and the Headlights »» Exhale
Monday, July 25th, 2005
7:48 pm	Imagine a cigarette burning away in an ashtray. A slight wind could move your way and it would burn down that tinyest bit more than usual. I'm burning for you. Imagine the affects of smoking... The damage is inside. I like to keep my damage inside. Imagine someone who has given up smoking. It's hard. It's hard to give you up. I don't suppose it's flattering to compare myself with a cigarette. I went on a walk today and it gave me chance to think, really clear my head. I thought of you and for the first time... i didn't cry. Even though i wanted to. I'm trying so hard and almost every part of me wants to tell you EXACTLY how i feel, but there is a sensible side of me that realises... i can't because it won't help. And i want to help, if not you then myself. Thank you for reading this if you did. Seems on this i am constantly moaning but hey, guess it makes it a little more interesting than what i ate at lunch today... Goodnight, Sleep tight and think of me, please :( Someone think of me... Current Mood: accomplished Current Music: Imogen Heap- Hide and Seek »» 4 Exhale
Tuesday, July 19th, 2005
9:12 pm	Does any fucker read this?! Comment to let me know because if not i might as well cancel this account... LOVE »» 10 Exhale
Sunday, July 10th, 2005
4:43 pm	This weekend: Absolutely awesome! I have never had so much fun in a long time and with recent events it is EXACTLY what i needed. So right now i shall thank Fiona Sian and Alys Grace for making this weekend smashing! Friday Night, Went back to Foo's straight from school and chilled out then we thought... right, start drinking so it reached approximately 5:15pm... we started on the vodka and coke, pimms and coke... oh yeah, we were being core. So it reached around quarter to six and we were pretty drunk. Me and Foo decided to shave her legs, that was random, but fun! Everyone arrived at Foo's for about 6/6:30pm we then knew it was time to get "jiggy". Out in to Tadcaster we popped and we were pretty wasted so me and Foo were just stumbling around like a lady with a rugby ball between her legs (great comparison!). I gave up on the drinking lark as my intoxication began to wear off, i thought REET, let's get the weed out. So then again me and Fiona indulged in to a joint, Foo had recently already had two blunts. We got back to Foo's and were once again W A N K E R E D! yay! Lucy, Me, Alys, Samuel, Rab and Loz slept at Foo's that night and woke up early in preperation to head to Blackpoooooolll. We got on the coach and off we were. Blackpool was mint, we went on the, what i like to call, Hullabaloo 3 times!! (The ride was actually called Valhala). Anyway, Alys bought a photo of me and her when we were absolutely soaked from it, they said you may get wet, we were dripping baby, after the first time we gave up on keeping our hair straight and just went on the pepsi max and big dipper and all that. For me it was really exciting because i'd never been before but everyone else had.... ARE YOU STILL READING THIS POST? BEST BE. Anyway, Blackpool ended so that was an ace Saturday DAY... We had 6 reefers left... Alys had a free house allllll night baby, no sisters, no brothers, just me, alys, foo, pikey and Danny. Seriously, i have never had such a great weekend with people i truely love. Forget all my other posts... THIS IS WHAT WE BLOODY LIVE FOR. This weekend has really helped me realise. Anyway, after the 6 joints, we retired, extremely wasted, had a little food then i went to sleep in a double bed all by myself but NOOOOO, Alys and Danny wanted that for their "PRIVATE TIME". So i left on a fluffy rug which at the time was REALLY comfortable but now... i am reeping the punishment, my neck hurts so bad, i might fall on some nails and die. Woke up this morning stumbling about and as soon as my eyes open i thought.... MENTHOL CIG! Off i went outside to indulge in one. :) I could not have enjoyed this weekend anymore with anyone else. I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH. My heart's still broken but this weekend made me forget everything <3! I hope your weekend was as good as mine. Current Mood: optimistic Current Music: None. »» Exhale
Friday, July 1st, 2005
7:41 pm	I love this picture so much.   If you don't agree that it is ace then suck my chod. Current Mood: REALLY FULL! Pizza wise. Current Music: Le Tigre - Deceptacon »» 2 Exhale
Thursday, June 23rd, 2005
2:10 pm	9 weeks and 4 days. Started 9th April, Finished 23rd June. I still love him. But i'm ready, after all this moaning, to move on and keep him in my mind, only as, a friend. Thank you for giving me over two months of happiness and all i can say is that none of this time was wasted because you truely did mean everything to me. This is the first break-up i am ok with. :) xoxoxo Current Mood: thankful Current Music: None »» 1 Exhale